It's giving season, and we hope you get everything you asked for this year, but what if there was something you could do to increase the likelihood of getting what you want...

Requests have more success when they’re addressed to those who are in our debt. How to achieve this? Well, it’s as simple as giving a gift, one that's meaningful, unexpected, and customised.

In one study, restaurant customers who were given a mint with their bill tipped more than those who went mint-less (meaningful). What’s interesting, though, is that two mints (each costing barely anything) increased this tip more than one (unexpected).

The real surprise happened when the waiter gave the first mint, then whilst leaving, turned and offered a second mint just because they deserved it (customised).

And guess what? Tips skyrocketed, increasing from 3.3% to 14%. Not bad for penny sweets.

1. Be the first to give

Don’t hesitate: be kind, be generous, and don’t necessarily expect anything in return – think about the kudos you’ll be building with the influencer.

2. Don’t downplay your gift

This isn’t about pressuring your chosen influencer to pay up and return the favour, but rather to make sure they recognise the meaningful nature of the gift.

3. Make your gift meaningful, unexpected and customised

This is part of the beauty of going first – your gift arrives completely unexpected and comes with added power - if it's also customised, you can be sure the principle of reciprocity will be serving you well.

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Download the Psychologist's Guide to Influence written by our very own Senior Psychologist, Alan Gray.